A 5-minute tip to make next Mother's Day your best yet (even if this year's was a bummer)

Soo...how was your Mother's Day?

Last week's post about how to avoid disappointment on Mother's Day got quite the response.

I heard from a friend struggling with infertility, a mom in a two-mom family (who'd like to cancel it), and from women I've never met across the country, all resonating with the complex feelings surrounding this day.

Leann wrote, "This is great, Charissa! Hit home as I have no idea if my husband will even remember it’s Mother’s Day." (Relatable!)

If your Sunday had its share of bumps and disappointments, fear not!

It's a great chance to reflect on what you'll do differently next time.

Here are 4 tips for future Mother's Days from Brave Self Care readers:

1) Consider staying off social media for the day.

Renae shared, "Definitely feel the resentment thing on this day. It's really hard not to compare social media wise. I should probably take this day off social media!"

2) Reframe it as a chance to show extra love to the moms in your life.

Jennifer told me, "This year I gifted dinner to my three sisters via Grubhub, DoorDash etc, and sent my MIL and mom big baskets of yummies and I feel soooo good. I realized that giving is what fills my bucket and it took no effort."

3) If you want time to be off-duty and away from your kids, let them know in a kind way.

This was my own hope for the day, but I realized I hadn't explained this to my older boys. When I did they were very understanding, and I felt less guilty for holing up in a quiet place every chance I got!

4) Remember that your kids are your gifts.

It may not feel like it at times, but this message from Priscilla sure reminded me:

"For me, this holiday represents another Mother’s Day when I will not be able to see my 18-y/o daughter who lives with her father sixty miles away, this year due to the coronavirus. So there is something to be said for appreciating and embracing the mom role on this occasion, even if it means baking the casserole and going under-recognized, with little time for yourself. Because your children are your gifts."

Your turn!

What would you do differently next year?
 
I invite you to take 5 minutes, right now, to write yourself a note about what you enjoyed and what you'd do differently next time.

Then:

• Put it in an email you schedule to be sent to yourself May 1st next year
• OR, add it to your calendar for May 1st of next year
• AND, if you have a partner, gently let them know what you enjoyed about the day and how you might approach it differently next time
  ​

It might mean you feel a lot better next Mother's Day.

​P.S. Want more self care wisdom to make mom life feel less fraught and more fulfilling? Join 260+ women on my email list for my best tips, real-life stories, and encouragement.