I still remember the mom at the third table from the left.
I’d just finished what I’d thought was a successful talk at a moms' group that met in the University District of Seattle.
I’d made the case that taking care of yourself isn’t selfish - it’s actually one of the best things you can do for yourself, your family, AND the world that needs the unique contribution only you can give.
The mom at the third table from the left raised her hand, holding a baby in her lap.
“I get that self care is important. But what if it feels like more work than it’s worth? If I’m going to go on a girls’ weekend with my friends, I’m going to have to find a time to go that works for everyone, book a place, then make all the arrangements for my kids and husband while I’m gone.”
D’oh. I’d missed the mark.
Self care can absolutely be a grownups-only weekend away. In fact, that sounds fantastic about now!
But what you do every day matters more than what you do every once in a while.
And that’s what I wished I’d communicated better to the mom who asked the question.
I love to coach moms and nonbinary parents and meet them right where they’re at. Instead of planning their escape from mom/parent mode, we dive right into what feels hard to help them make time for things they love and feel confident handling tough things.
What you do every day matters more than what you do every once in a while.
Effective self care doesn’t have to be huge. It doesn’t have to involve plane tickets. It doesn’t even have to be perfect (or be completely kid-free).
Self care - in your everyday, dirty-dishes, carpool-line, crumbs-on-the-floor life - can help you feel amazing even when you’re not sitting poolside with an icy margarita and juicy novel.
That's why I'm so glad you're here with me, learning how to care for yourself as you care for others.
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Brave Self Care client Jessica with her son, Emile & husband, Chris
Have you ever started a sentence with
One of my clients, Jessica, wrote an article for her workplace's blog all about this tendency, and as soon as I read it I knew I wanted to share it with you.
Take a deep breath in...exhale...and enjoy!
Comparative Suffering and
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