I took my fried rice to the car and shut the door.
Let me back up. I should've known better.
These days we try to do something dead easy for lunch. But with nothing in the fridge that resembled lunch for five people, I decided to cook something while Greg was in a meeting.
I pulled out cold rice, bacon, leftover veggies and a carton of eggs and heated up the frying pan as our big boys literally climbed the walls yelling and the 1.5 year old did his own exploring on the stairs.
Already frazzled from trying find a distance learning video link that didn't exist that morning (grrrr...), I shuttled between the hot pan and cutting board, trying to work fast enough to outpace everyone's hunger.
Then - BANG! "Waaaaaaahhh!"
Unattended, our 1.5 year old had fallen down the stairs.
Pax's tears and the goose egg forming on his forehead were the final straw.
As soon as I could hand lunch and and the kids over to Greg, I headed out to the car with my bowl of fried rice, a book and my thermos.
My battery was zapped but the 25 minutes of quiet that followed were like being docked at a charging station.
I read about something totally unrelated to parenting and Covid, enjoyed the meal I'd made, and told friends what had happened on Instagram.
A month ago, telling me to eat lunch in my own driveway would have sounded nuts.
Now it's one of the creative, resourceful ways I know I can get some breathing room and energy to go back to mom mode.
Could you use some breathing room?
Do you need more energy?
Is your car looking like an attractive place for a kid-free getaway?
I can help!
I’m offering one-on-one coaching to help you have time to look forward to every day, just for you - so you can have energy, brainspace, and feel amazing from the inside out.
It's not impossible, even during the pandemic. It's an effective way to give yourself permission to start doing the things you want to do, guilt-free.
If you’re ready to feel refreshed when it's time to go back to mom mode, or even do things you miss while still taking amazing care of your family, I can help get you there.
Let's get creative. :)
For three months, she didn't feel like a person.
After finding out she was pregnant at 20 weeks along (!), my client's baby boy arrived without warning, two months early. He was born a preemie with developmental delays.
The three months after her son was born were a blur of appointments and drives to and from the neonatal unit at the hospital.
Now, getting back into a rhythm of work and caring for her son's needs, she reached out for help.
Today, I'd like to share her story. Because it IS possible to care for yourself while caring for others, and my client is proof.
(name and photo changed by request)
Kids: One 1 year old, born a preemie with developmental delays
Goal: Make a do-able and exciting plan to get productive rest throughout the day.
Rachel continued to be in an intense season.
Her son needed a lot of care. She wondered, "How I'm acting as a mother - is that a good example for him?" "Am I being the person in my day-to-day life that I want to be?"
She and her husband worked from home.
Though she work and her son, getting rest was hard.
What coaching helped her realize:
Rachel realized that getting rest didn't have to look like sitting on the couch.
She learned it was crucial for her to get out of the house to let her mind rest from seeing all the unfinished "to-dos" of the day.
The main problem was getting time outside without being interrupted by her sweet, retired neighbors (who always stopped her to chat about her baby).
As with all my clients, Rachel got to pick action steps at the end of our session.
Rachel's action steps:
One week later I heard from Rachel
"I've taken lots of practical steps toward my goal!! So many steps that I've actually surprised myself :)
I have a strong tendency to think and think and think about change but never actually do anything. In the week since we talked, I've been much more conscious of my choices with my down time and I've been excited to choose to go on a walk whenever possible."
One YEAR later
Not only did Rachel do ALL of her action steps listed above, but she's kept up the practice of walking in her neighborhood. In the time that's passed, she and her husband had a baby girl.
She says, "Strapping both kids in the double stroller and taking a long walk in the afternoon has been a true saving grace. I've established a long route that takes me out of my neighborhood, so I don't have to talk to anyone and I can zone out completely."
This is why I love coaching conscientious, caring moms like you!
You may be running on empty. Yet with a compassionate coach, you are able to come up with the best solutions and refuel for the journey ahead.
With just a couple weeks of coaching, Rachel learned how to get productive rest right away and for over a YEAR afterwards. Talk about return on investment!
Are you ready to figure out what recharges your batteries and make a plan you're excited about - so you can have energy for what you love and care about most?
Me too. :) Click the button below to get started.
P.S. This is a perfect introduction to self care coaching - hop on it!
[Confession: I started this post sincerely thinking it would be a light one about how I started drinking more water to take care of myself in the midst of the coronavirus pandemic. LOL. Read on to find out why I couldn't make that the main takeaway!]
Just three weeks ago in Seattle, Washington...
Tuesday, our oldest son overheard a teacher say they might be closing school.
Wednesday, the email came: "Schools will be closed a minimum of 14 calendar days".
Thursday, another update: School would be closed for 6 weeks. At least.
Our world had been turned upside-down.
In a matter of days, I heard left and right of other friends' schools being closed, events being canceled, and whole cities, counties, and states taking drastic measures to slow the spread of Covid-19.
I pictured my grandma sitting alone in her brown recliner, unable to leave her assisted living home. Was ever I going to see her, healthy, again?
The link lists and homeschooling ideas came pouring into my social media feeds and inbox. Was I really in charge of my kids' education for the forseeable future?
Then Greg found out his work would need to carry on as usual, but from home - and that a reduced schedule wasn't on the table.
I cried for all the times in my life I felt like my needs and dreams had gotten shoved aside to be able to rise to the occasion of whatever was needed of me.
Have a newborn but need to go to grad school? I'm on it.
Baby waking through the night but you need to sleep in? I'm on it.
Move to a new city but too late in the year to get into a good preschool? I'm on it.
I'll do it. I'll take care of it. Who else will if I won't?
"What about ME!?" I wanted to scream. "Don't I matter?"
If you're feeling any of what I felt three weeks ago, know that you're not alone.
We're experiencing grief, on a personal and global level.
Whether you're saddened by not being able to see friends and family, overwhelmed by how the crisis is affecting your community, panicked with not knowing what will happen with your job, or sobered by knowing someone who's lost a loved one, these are important and valid feelings.
Feel your feelings and tell the people you trust when you're ready.
(I definitely left tearful voice messages, text-messaged up a storm with friends, and talked to Greg after I'd cooled off.)
We'll dive into more practical tips for taking great care of yourself and your family later.
For now, a big virtual hug from me to you, and full permission to be sad, mad, afraid, or whatever else you may be.
You're human in a weird time, and that's okay. Your brave self care for today can be to feel whatever's coming up for you without judgement and let it run its course.
We're in this together.
Want to be the first to learn how to take a break when your kids are home 24/7?
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