These pink flowers with the sweet, soapy scent are called daphne, and they are my Baachan's (mom's mom's) favorite flower. Though Seattle is blustery and wet, smelling and seeing these little buds around town is a reminder that winter won't last forever.
I've been thinking a lot about seasons. It seems in motherhood that the seasons come in waves, each with their own joys and challenges. In various seasons, I confess my thoughts have been...
I can't wait 'til he sleeps through the night.
I can't wait 'til he's done nursing.
I can't wait 'til he's potty trained.
I can't wait 'til they play together.
I can't wait 'til they play together without wanting to kill each other : )
I can't wait 'til they're both in school full time.
Notice a theme? Hear me out.
If we're not careful, we can miss out on our CURRENT season while wishing that the next one were here already, gosh darn it!
In the throes of sleep deprivation and nighttime nursings, a wise dad told us that, as painful as it was at the time, he looked back on the early days of midnight wakings as a precious time with his babies. Not saying we need to paste a smile on - parenting is hard - but instead, to recognize what's good about where we are now.
One of the first tools I give clients helps them assess what's working and what isn't. We talk about where they are right NOW. We make a plan for how they can thrive within their current season, not fight it or wish it was a different season.
One client told me she had a deep feeling of, "I'm a mom - I can't be anything else!" She was in a season of full-time caregiving for her kids (3 years old and younger) and had laid down her aspirations to be a writer.
We worked together so she could embrace the season she was in. She had a breakthrough: "I can write - right now." She carved out regular times to write, crafted a mission statement, and even brainstormed multiple blog posts she would be excited to pitch to other blogs or write for her own. The last time I checked in with her, she had enrolled in and taken an online course for bloggers, purchased a domain name, and was on a path to start a new online home for her writing.
You might be in the nursing-and-diapers phase. Or the working-and-kid-shuttling phase. Or the business-building-with-a-1-year-old-at-home phase. Whatever season you're in, I encourage you to embrace it!
You have the gift of time, now.
You have good work to do, now.
You've been given your family, now.
There is rest for you, now.
You can learn new things and laugh at yourself, now.
There is good for you, now.
Wanting you to know this today,
What are you grateful for in this season?
What do you hope the next season brings?
Let me know in the comments!
Why Every Mother Needs a Life Coach
Clearing up myths about working with a coach.
"I’ve embarked on a journey to remember how fun I am."
A mama I met through my Self Care 101 workshop wrote this beautiful piece about rediscovering joy after motherhood.
"Jesus had to go out to the desert to be alone."
Saying "yes" to God when you barely have space.
A support group for moms of color...
I met Amy Pak through our kids' preschool. So proud of the safe space she is making for moms of color in Seattle and beyond.
"Without knowledge of self, there is no knowledge of God."
Who said this? Some new age thinker? Nope; John Calvin, in 1536(!).
Got something worth reading? I'd love to hear!
The other day I walked past this pair of shoes on the sidewalk. I thought they might belong to a woman standing near them. Then I saw them the next day. And the next.
These shoes have been left for good!
They reminded me of a story a friend told me. She had been working in a particular field because it seemed like a good match for her. But as she continued it became clear: "It was like wearing shoes that didn't fit."
Can you relate?
Like I shared in a previous post, I have a background in art and a history of working for museums and creative businesses (ask me about the time I apprenticed for a hatmaker!). But after I became a mother, something shifted.
When I did return to work, I enjoyed supporting the creative businesses I worked for. But eventually my interest waned. I was finding a deep joy making authentic friendships and building community, and the benefits of my jobs weren't outweighing the costs of arranging the many, many details of childcare, transportation, parking, etc.
The shoes didn't fit anymore.
Maybe you're feeling like your shoes don't fit. A role you took on excitedly is no longer life-giving. A position at work has gone from energizing to draining. Stay-at-home motherhood is a blessing, but it might also be the end of you.
If that resonates, I'd love to talk.
Because eventually, my friend found her vocation (or rather, it found her!). It was a long road, but she had an amazing experience of being given a call that she never imagined for herself. We hung out this week and she even told me she has a powerful sense that her current role as a midwife is just the beginning of the work she is being asked to do in this world.
And as I made time for the things that brought me life, I found exactly the next step to take. I learned that my love for building authentic relationships was to be used in my coaching practice. We found what fit.
I deeply believe that when we connect to what brings us life, we connect to who we're designed to be and what we're meant to do in the world. If you'd like to explore what this could look like for you, I'd love to help!
Each month I set aside time to connect with folks who feel like their shoes just aren't fitting. In our 30 minute intake interview, we talk about what is and isn't working, and how coaching might help them find shoes that fit.
Click here to book your intake interview.
I'll be looking for your name to pop up in my scheduler!
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