You love your kids to the moon and back.
But between them and everything else on your plate, you don’t have time to take a break.
You feel overwhelmed by what it takes to keep up, day in, day out. You want to lock yourself in the bathroom for some peace and quiet, but hiding from your kids and scrolling your phone leaves you feeling worse than before.
The lack of space to decompress and recharge leaves you looking for an escape while you’re with your kids. You’re multitasking, stressed and distracted when you know what they really need is a calm and present parent.
You feel overwhelmed by what it takes to keep up, day in, day out. You want to lock yourself in the bathroom for some peace and quiet, but hiding from your kids and scrolling your phone leaves you feeling worse than before.
The lack of space to decompress and recharge leaves you looking for an escape while you’re with your kids. You’re multitasking, stressed and distracted when you know what they really need is a calm and present parent.
I totally get it.Hi, I'm Charissa Pomrehn.
I coach parents with nonstop responsibilities who just need a break. They’re overwhelmed and secretly feel guilty for not enjoying every moment. I help them make time for themselves, do things they love, and handle hard situations with confidence so they can become the kind of parent (and person) they’ve always wanted to be. |
When our first son was born, I jumped into full-time parenting with both feet.
I loved being a mom. My own mom was a great example of a loving, nurturing mother and I had always imagined getting to be that for my own kids. But as the first of my friends to have a baby, I wasn’t prepared for how lonely and all-consuming it would be.
I was deeply in love with my baby but also living in a world of never-ending feeding sessions, diaper changes, and countless hours spent rocking him to sleep. I dog-eared breastfeeding and child development books and called our pediatrician out of desperation to figure out how to get him to sleep. I felt like I lived in an alternate universe than friends who were following their passions in the entertainment industry and higher education. I felt invisible to the world, worthless in a society that valued productivity, money and status. |
I cringed at the question, "So, what do you do?"
Being a mom was one of the most important roles I’d ever had, yet it seemed impossible to convey “what I did” to others, much less the brilliant PhD students and professors my husband was rubbing shoulders with as a grad student at Caltech.
Being a mom was one of the most important roles I’d ever had, yet it seemed impossible to convey “what I did” to others, much less the brilliant PhD students and professors my husband was rubbing shoulders with as a grad student at Caltech.
A few years into motherhood, I got restless.
I took some jobs in my original field after lots of consideration and tons of daycare research. I loved putting on a cool outfit for work and getting to wear a new ‘hat’ at my job.
I remembered that I had more to offer the world than being able to make dinner with random ingredients from the fridge. I also experienced the impossibility of needing to be in two places at once, as work ran late JUST as daycare was about to close. I experienced my child being the last one to be picked up, waiting for me at the gate as I dashed from my car to get him. I negotiated a first-ever maternity leave with my company when we got pregnant with our second, and pumped breastmilk in a changing room when I got back to work. |
I was good at what I did and enjoyed helping people.
But my heart wasn’t in it.
I was no longer excited to pursue what I thought was my chosen professional path.
But my heart wasn’t in it.
I was no longer excited to pursue what I thought was my chosen professional path.
What was I supposed to be doing besides being a mom?
If the work I was doing didn't light me up, what would?
I had so much to be thankful for, but not knowing my “something else” in addition to motherhood left me feeling angsty.
When our oldest was 4 years old and his brother was just a baby, our family moved from California to my hometown, Seattle. My husband had just finished grad school and gotten a job there, plus we wanted to be near family (yay grandparents and free babysitting!). Though we were thrilled to be living near my family, we were basically starting over from scratch in finding friends and community. Add to that the fact that we’d moved too late in the year to get into a preschool. I was home all day with a 4 year old and 6 month old with hardly any friends and none of the volunteer roles or job responsibilities I’d had before. It was a lonely and overwhelming time. |
The bright spot in this dark time was doing what I loved best, reaching out to others and creating the beginnings of deep friendships.
I loved texting new acquaintances when they came to mind, finding areas of common interest, and being vulnerable about my hopes and disappointments so they could feel comfortable doing the same. |
Then I made a discovery.
A friend told me she was being certified as a life coach.
A giant light bulb CLICKED!
The more I learned about what coaching was, the more excited I got.
My heart broke into a huge smile as I saw the best of myself reflected in what coaches do.
Get out; that is so freaking cool!
Why was I so excited about coaching?
A giant light bulb CLICKED!
The more I learned about what coaching was, the more excited I got.
My heart broke into a huge smile as I saw the best of myself reflected in what coaches do.
- You mean I could have deep and authentic conversations - as my job?
- I could create safe spaces for others to share their hearts - as my job?
- I could learn to ask questions that would help others make significant changes in their lives - as my JOB?
Get out; that is so freaking cool!
Why was I so excited about coaching?
Let me take you back to kindergarten.
Across the tumbling mats in gym class, I saw her. A brown-haired girl with blue eyes. She looked nice.
I went up to her and asked, "Will you be my friend?"
She said, "Yes," and a best friendship was born.
For most of my life, friendship and relationship-building have been tremendously important to me. They’re natural strengths.
"You've always had such good friends," my mom said to me. Others remarked, "That's a great question," time and time again in conversation. I loved going deep in conversation with others and building authentic relationships.
But when it came to my career, being a good friend and great question-asker didn't seem to point me in any direction at all.
If there was a way to be a professional friend, I would do it.
But no such job seemed to exist.
Or so I’d thought.
I trained hard, was certified as a coach, and the rest is history.
But no such job seemed to exist.
Or so I’d thought.
I trained hard, was certified as a coach, and the rest is history.
A client remarked that what I do now is like
"sacred friendship"
I couldn't have said it better.
I coach because I was once a burned-out and resentful mom who didn’t know what she was worth without a job. I didn’t know if I was worth taking time for, if I was worth spending money on, or if I mattered beyond what I did for my kids.
I coach because I also know the intense guilt of putting your crying child in the arms of a caregiver you’ve only known a few weeks and walking away. I know the rush of going from “work mode” to “mom mode” with hardly a chance to take a breath in between.
I needed to know what I hope my clients come to know:
I coach because I was once a burned-out and resentful mom who didn’t know what she was worth without a job. I didn’t know if I was worth taking time for, if I was worth spending money on, or if I mattered beyond what I did for my kids.
I coach because I also know the intense guilt of putting your crying child in the arms of a caregiver you’ve only known a few weeks and walking away. I know the rush of going from “work mode” to “mom mode” with hardly a chance to take a breath in between.
I needed to know what I hope my clients come to know:
- You matter as a full human being, just for who you are, not just for your usefulness to the family, cool job title, or service to others.
- That you can take doable and exciting steps to calm the chaos and bring peace into the worst parts of your day.
- That being a mom doesn’t mean shrinking small, but growing to joyfully take your place in the world and make your important contribution to it.
"[A] responsible mother is not one slowly dying for her children, but one showing her children how to bravely live." -Glennon Doyle
I can’t wait to help even more parents make time for themselves, do things they love, and handle hard situations with confidence so they can become the kind of people they’ve always wanted to be.
When I coach, my clients get someone...
One of my favorite clients told me, "I am a completely different person from who I was three months ago."
When I coach, my clients get someone...
- who is 100% on their side
- who sees them - how hard they’re trying, what’s challenging, and what they’re good at
- who listens not just to what they’re saying, but for what the deeper significance might be
- who asks powerful questions that make hard situations make sense
- who makes space for them to creatively brainstorm their own solutions, instead of giving advice, so they own their next steps and are motivated to take them
One of my favorite clients told me, "I am a completely different person from who I was three months ago."